A game of the walking Titans
by tyronicals
Summary: <html><head></head>When little Eren embarks out of Tits Banging for the Wall, he has no idea what he's in for. Little does he know that him and his friends are in for one hell of an adventure.</html>


"OMG THEY'RE GONNA KILL YOU FOR THAT EREN, YOU CAN'T JUST HAVE SEX WITH THE QUEEN WHEN YOU FEEL HORNY!" Screamed Armin. Mikasa just hid in the corner, secretly jealous of the new found affections that Eren had for Queen Cersei. "Armin's right, did you like, hear what happened to her hubby? He like, totally died and stuff". Mikasa was good at keeping her emotions buried, even though half of Westeros knew that she wanted to bone her bro due to a drunken night and an open twitter account in the well-known night club, 'Littlefinger's lantern'. "Will you guys just stop complaining, what me and Cersei have is special, and nobody will..." Before Eren could finish, a scream came from the tower of the Queen and a woman, dressed in beautiful red satin lingerie came streaming from the window, blond hair flowing behind her. "Well shit" muttered Eren, as he rode away from the castle, followed closely by Mikasa and Armin. They barely got past the castle gates before they slammed shut, followed by screams and moans, similar to that of the Queens. But Eren held back the thought, he didn't want to rub salt in the wounds that he'd left in his friends. He looked forward at the city and prepared for the journey that was to come. They were going to escape Tits Banging.

They never had much of a chance to actually see the city for what it was when they were riding to the castle, mostly because they travelled through the tunnels, but all that they missed was showing itself now. As they progressed down the hill the quality of the homes worsened, and by the time they reached Shit-bottom there were hardly any fully structured houses at all. "God, this place stinks worse than when we had that curry night!" exclaimed Armin as he began to have horrific flashbacks to his 18th. "Yeah, I know right, like, Jean was in the toilets for like, forever, and I was totally horny for him, his loss though". "You don't fucking say, Levi nearly had a heart attack when he saw the state of those walls!" Shouted Eren followed by a chuckle. The laughs soon turned to vomiting though, and they were nowhere near the gate. "God, have these people like never heard of Airwick?!" Shouted Mikasa which was hard enough seeing as though her mouth was filling up with last night's pasta bake. "We're nearly there! Just a few more blocks and..GAH" Armin screamed as a net fell down on him. Eren and Mikasa turned as soon as they noticed but it was milli-seconds before a net fell on them aswell. "I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD HAVE STAYED AT THE CASTLE!" Screamed Mikasa as they were dragged off into a shack by a pile of shit. It smelled surprisingly nice inside, and Eren could have sworn he could smell Spiced apple. He looked around at his surroundings, and strangely enough he was correct. There was a spiced apple Yankee candle on the table by the centre of the room. "Hey, what's with the candle?" He questioned. "Spiced apple is a seasonal scent, you should have Lemon Lavender or Clean cotton for spring, not fucking spiced apple!" Eren was beginning to get angry, everything about this city was wrong. "It's the order of the king fucker, dumbass, have you been living in the Shiganshina District before it got infiltrated by Titans and forced into the safety of Wall Maria but then that gets infiltrated and then you're forced to the inner walls or something?". "Actually, yeah" Eren mumbled as he began to tear up. "HOW FUCKING DARE YOU SPEAK TO MY SEXY HOT BROTHER LIKE THAT YOU FUCKING DICKFACE I WILL FUCK UP YOUR RECTUM" Screamed Mikasa. Her rage flooded her body and she broke the chains that bound her hands. Her eyes seemed to glow with the rage as she let loose on their captors. When it was all over, they were the only ones in the shack. "Hey, Mikasa…Do you really think I'm sexy?" "Eren…" Mikasa started but then Eren interrupted her. "Because I…I think you're sexy too…" Eren stuttered. Mikasas eyes sparkled with hope, but then Eren put her down. "JOKING, ha you freak". Mikasa started crying, and Armin cried because Mikasa was crying. Armin had loved her for all of his life after all. "Calm your tits sis, we still have to get out of here". Eren looked for a weapon of some sort before starting out the door, but he soon ran back inside. "Okay, problem, the Queens out there…" "Oh that's great" Armin started. "But she's missing an arm and half of her face…" "Oh, that's…that's not so great" Armin finished, before crying again because he doesn't like ugly people. They hadn't even noticed that Mikasa had gone until she came in through the front door holding the head of the Late, Late Queen. "Problem sorted like, let's go!". Eren extinguished the candle using his fingers but burned himself. Not thinking much of it, he left the shack, not looking back. They moved through the gate into the titan territory, and made a start for the Wall. "This is gonna be a long ride" Muttered Armin as they rode off down the road.


End file.
